You’ve spent decades raising kids, advancing your career and navigating the ups and downs of life; then, just like that, the children head off to university, the nest empties and suddenly you’re confronted with the next chapter of your life. The good news? This new phase has plenty of perks ... including the opportunity to rekindle that spark with your partner. Yes, we’re talking about sex. So, if you’ve ever wondered whether it gets better with age, spoiler alert - it definitely can!
First things first: You might think that with age, your sex drive naturally declines, or that sexual satisfaction is reserved for younger generations. But science begs to differ. In fact, studies show as we reach our 50s and 60s many of us are enjoying sex just as much (if not more) than we did when we were younger.
A 2017 study published in The Journal of Sexual Medicine revealed that older adults are increasingly sexually active. Better yet, a substantial number said they’re having satisfying sex well into their 70s and beyond. Clearly, those myths about passion dying with age can be tossed out with your reading glasses.
But why is this so important? Beyond the obvious pleasure, regular love making comes with a host of benefits that touch every area of your life, from your physical health to your emotional wellbeing.
Boosts Your Immune System: Believe it or not, an active sex life is linked to better immune function. Research from Wilkes University in Pennsylvania found that individuals who have sex once or twice a week had higher levels of an antibody called immunoglobulin A (IgA), which helps fend off colds and infections. So, if you’re looking for a fun way to stay healthy as flu season approaches, getting active beneath the sheets could be your new secret weapon.
Keeps Your Heart Healthy: Studies, including one published in The American Journal of Cardiology, have indeed shown that frequent sexual activity can have heart health benefits by improving cardiovascular function and reducing heart disease risk. It can also help regulate hormones and promote blood flow.
Reduces Stress And Improves Sleep: Let’s face it: by the time you hit your 50s, you’ve probably encountered your fair share of stress - work, parenting and mortgages ... the list goes on. But the fact that sex can reduces stress is widely supported by scientific evidence. It releases oxytocin and endorphins, both of which help promote feelings of relaxation and bonding, and can also improve sleep quality, particularly after orgasm.
Enhances Cognitive Function: Want to stay sharp as a tack as you age? According to a study published in Age and Ageing, regular sexual activity in older adults was associated with better cognitive performance, particularly in memory and verbal fluency tests. So, if you’re looking for a way to boost brainpower, getting jiggy with it could be a lot more effective (and fun) than the daily crossword.
Strengthening Your Connection
For many couples, life after the kids move out can be a shock to the system. All those years of focusing on the little ones, driving them to sports clubs and and managing school diaries meant your relationship took a back seat. But now you can finally focus on each other again.
Rediscovering your partner sexually can be a deeply enriching experience. Without the constant demands of children, you can reconnect in ways that might have been lost in the chaos of daily life.
Open Communication: After years together, you might think you know everything about your partner’s desires. But people change, and so do their preferences in the bedroom. This is the perfect time to openly discuss what you both want and need. Be curious, be adventurous, and remember: great sex starts with great communication.
Explore New Pleasures: One of the advantages of being in a long-term relationship is the trust and comfort you’ve built with your partner. Use this foundation to explore new sexual activities, from different positions and incorporating toys to experimenting with massage. Variety is the spice of life after all.
Prioritise Intimacy: Of course life can still get busy even when the nest is empty, but you'll find there is more time to put emotional and physical intimacy at the top of your to-do list. Whether it’s scheduling regular date nights, making time for weekend getaways or simply spending more time being affectionate, these little efforts can lead to big rewards in the bedroom.
Physical Changes? No Problem: It’s no secret that ageing bodies don’t always perform the way they used to. For women, menopause can bring changes like vaginal dryness or a drop in libido. For men, erectile dysfunction might become more common. But these challenges don’t have to stop you from enjoying a bit of bedroom (or kitchen table!) action. Lubricants, hormone replacement therapy and medications can help. What’s more, embracing these changes together can deepen your bond and create a stronger sense of partnership.
Embrace the New Chapter: Far from signalling the end of your sex life, empty nesting offers an opportunity to rediscover and redefine what intimacy means to you and your partner. If you’re looking for better health, deeper connection or simply something that puts a big smile on your face, the bedroom might just be the best place to start!
At Dr Julia Sen, we are one of the few clinics in the UK to offer the state-of-the-art FormaV, an effective women’s health procedure that targets a whole host of issues, including vaginal and vulva tightening, and improved tissue quality. By treating these, clients have experienced a decrease in stress continence and itching, while also seeing an increase in natural lubrication and more pleasurable sex. Win win!